《疑心病》一叶知境

13、关于邱的留言 大千世界里

　　（一）
　　小邱同学 从21年5月27日我开始喜欢上你暗恋你你很优秀 你就像天上的星星遥远到我永远都碰不到可我就是不信邪我一直在努力直到我自以为变得和你一样优秀 自以为自己追到了光。我很自私 我不希望我的爱意没有回应 所以我开始靠近你让你注意到我你开始和我讲话 跟我一起讨论题目后来你知道我喜欢你给了我你的联系方式也就是微信和电话 我很开心很开心晚上睡觉时我还在想“邱yt 即使你多优秀 最后不还是我的男人”过了几天依旧不敢打电话给你朋友也一直在怂恿我打给你那天晚上我打了你也接了我很懵没想到你会接我挂了后你在微信上找我也就是那一次我和你在微信上聊了半个多钟后来你说你有事 先不聊了我在想我今晚一定会做个好梦 刚要睡觉你的电话就打来了问我睡了吗事情解决完了可以继续聊 我又和你聊了一个多钟聊到12点多才挂我觉得这一切都太突然了一开始明明是我暗恋着你怎么事情变成了这样每天我都在期待上学 期待和你见面日子过得正如我意我觉得这个事情的发展越来越好可到现在你开始不回我消息不接我电话 在学校找你聊天你不理不管谁做错永远都是我在道歉…我喜欢你我爱你那我就是要卑微就是要受委屈是吗你是在消遣我的爱你知道吗这个暑假每天晚上都在想你每天都在翻我和你的聊天记录通话记录有次不小心电话打了给你我给你发短信说抱歉打错了你压根不理我看看 就这点小事我都要和你道歉我多卑微啊。我喜欢你的优秀 喜欢你对每个人的尊重爱你这个人可我讨厌你不回消息讨厌你逃避我的话题讨厌你的不耐烦 讨厌你的冷暴力你是觉得我喜欢你所以我就要一直道歉吗我也想冷暴力你不理你想让你知道我真的生气了想让你理解我安慰我跟我说以后都不会了可我冷暴力你伤心难过的永远是我自己我好累可是我真的好贱我就是喜欢你爱你我也觉得我烦 我恶心我都想一巴掌扇醒我自己可是我还是忘了你不是我的谁 我没理由管你你是天上的星星我也只能远远的看着。
　　（二）
　　我真的很想很想你，很爱你，即使曾经我们有很多的不愉快，可是一想到之前所有的美好，我就觉得好遗憾好遗憾，好想和你继续在一起啊！我们已经分开快两个月了，双方都给彼此造成了伤害，导致回不去，真的好难受.....
　　（三）
　　告诉你个秘密。我喜欢你啊，真的。很好笑吧，我用这么老套的方式表白。我曾经以为自己只是开个玩笑，说着玩玩。结果真的喜欢上了。她带带着那么多人过来堵我的时候，我还真不知道是害怕多一点还是失落多一点。其实我早就知道了，可还是像个脑瘫一样的希望你哪怕一点点的喜欢。送你一句话吧。“我把玫瑰藏在身后，听你对她说，风也温柔。”
　　（四）
　　我喜欢你真的很喜欢你但是我不敢和你讲话 只能看着你和别人有说有笑我只能羡慕我多希望下次很你讲话的人是我啊 我是爱你的jia
　　（五）
　　邱佳华我喜欢你在你不认识我的时候我就喜欢你了我知道你和我不可能所以我们做朋友就好啦 虽然我觉得和喜欢的人做朋友很奇怪但是也没办法嘛你又不喜欢我每次你让我推荐朋友给你认识我都有点难过我感觉你是个中央空调你并不是我喜欢的类型但是我还是喜欢你
　　（六）
　　邱家烨，我好爱你。你为什么就是不知道呢？我喜欢你两年了，我求求你主动点好嘛，你跟别的女生打打闹闹的时候。我承认我吃醋了，但是我没身份吃醋。烦死了啊，你个笨蛋
　　（七）
　　邱yj 今天是10号我从学校回来了这个星期他们老是跟我说“该放下了考虑考虑别人吧”“何必呢他都不喜欢你了”我都知道啊 我知道你不喜欢我了可是怎么办呢我放不下 现在是半夜 我睡不着 闭眼就是曾经我最近老是做噩梦要是以前我和你说做噩梦你肯定要笑我小大人了还怕这玩意然后开语音给我讲故事听现在呢我晚上放着歌睡觉我这星期有很骄傲的事情哦 我的美术作业拿奖啦 我本来想给你发消息的可是打开列表的时候才记起我已经没有你的联系方式了我快放假了你说过寒假见面的现在应该是见不了了没告诉你的是我去见你了我看的你和你兄弟有说有笑和女朋友聊天邱yj 我们分手马上就两个月了你都开始新生活了这是我最后一次给你留言啦 如果有天你会来看留言希望那个时候你还能记得我吧我想我必须要开始回到没认识你的生活了你是我的初恋 我众所周知的初恋 我喜欢的人我们之间的回忆太多了你在我的世界里留下太多痕迹了我一直都在控制自己对你的思念可是我醒悟了我不要再为你哭了我要为自己为生活邱yj 以后雷雨天我不会想起你了做噩梦也不想你不管怎么样我都要忘掉你 。我的喜欢以后就在今天停下吧
　　（八）
　　邱yj 我好想你啊 我今天又一直单曲循环你爱的歌我听着歌看你的酷狗主页我看的你关注了一个女孩子可能她是你的新女朋友吧可我好嫉妒她啊 我们在一起的时候只是我关注你而你从不回关我找到了她的QQ 看到了你们牵手的官宣照片看到你的好兄弟都祝福你们我想起我们在一起时没官宣而你的兄弟甚至是我们在一起快两年才知道我的存在而我的朋友却是知道你的存在三年多。邱你知不知道从我们在一起时我就跟朋友说起你跟姐妹聊你和我这三年多我和我姐妹的聊天十句九句不离你而你呢我扪心自问，我从不逼你做你不喜欢的事 不逼你官宣也不逼你换情侣头像我收藏里有好多好多情头但我怕你觉得我烦从未和你说过我该怎么告诉你我嫉妒你主动官宣的她你主动牵她主动介绍她主动要她换情头开情空我真的好难过在你眼里我到底算什么消遣物吗邱我们算上一起认识的时间有784天了我到底该怎么忘记你，我也真的好像放弃你不为你哭可我就是做不到我到底该怎么办邱，我真的好想放下你往前走可我要怎么做呢我对爱的期待没了希望没了我该怎么办呢
　　（九）
　　说实话我挺排斥任何人和我聊黄，一起看不干净的，还有就是很不喜欢任何人用什么威胁我要做什么。对这种行为就很无奈，但是对于关系真的很好的我解决不了，不会拒绝，不想承担拒绝之后会发生什么后果。就比如说你之前经常问我的那些问题，还有找我要的那些照片，就真的挺无奈的。真的有时候你问的那些问题就很想回避，但是你就一直揪着那些问题不放。
　　（十）
　　邱yj ，如果没分手今年就是我们的第四年啦，今天是分手的第37天，我过得很好，今天去买奶茶看到以前给你写的便利贴了，我没留着它继续在奶茶店的墙上，我撕下来扔掉了。我今天把为你留的长头发剪成齐肩了，特丑，但我一点也不后悔，我把关于你的东西都扔掉啦。这样是不是就能不记得你了，邱，下一次不喜欢了记得说一声在删掉，记得不要不喜欢却因为不甘心而同意复合啦，记得不要老是抽烟喝酒，记得我的声音就好啦。那些承诺我替你抹掉，祝你岁岁平安。
　　（十一）
　　祝你平平安安开开心心，也祝你在以后的日子里身边都有我，或者记住我就好。
　　（英文版指路）
　　(I)

　　Xiaoqiu, since May 27, 21, I began to fall in love with you secretly. You are excellent. You are as far away as the stars in the sky that I will never touch it, but I don't believe in evil. I have been working hard until I think I have become as good as you. I think I have caught up with the light. I'm very selfish. I don't want my love to respond, so I began to get close to you and let you notice me. You began to talk to me and discuss the topic with me. Later, you knew I liked you to give me your contact information, that is, WeChat and phone. I was very happy to go to bed at night. I was still thinking, "Qiuyt, even if you have more Excellent, it's not my man in the end." After a few days, I still didn't dare to call your friend and kept encouraging me to call you that night. I called you and picked it up. I was very confused that you would pick me up. After hanging up, you came to me on WeChat. That was the time I chatted with you on WeChat for more than half an hour. Later, you said you had something to do. Don't talk about it yet. I was thinking that I would have a good dream tonight. As soon as I was about to go to bed, your phone called to ask me if I slept. After the matter was solved, I could continue to chatting. I chatted with you for more than an hour until after 12 o'clock. I didn't hang up. I thought it was too sudden. At first, it was obvious that I secretly fell in love with you. How did things become like this every day. Learning, looking forward to meeting you. Life is as I think this thing is getting better and better, but now you don't reply to my message and answer my phone. I'm chatting with you at school. No matter who is wrong, I'm always apologising... I like you. I love you. Then I just want to be humble or wronged, right? You're having fun. Love, do you know that I miss you every night this summer vacation? I'm looking through my chat records with you every day. I accidentally called you. I texted you and said I'm sorry for the wrong number. You ignored it at all. I'm going to apologise to you for this little thing. How humble I am. I like your excellence. I like your respect for everyone. I love you, but I hate you not replying to messages. I hate you escaping my topic. I hate your impatience. I hate your cold violence. Do you think I like you, so I have to apologise all the time? I also want cold violence. You ignore you. You want to let you know that I'm really angry and want you understand. I comforted me and told me that I won't do it anymore, but I'm cold and violent. You're sad. It's always me. I'm so tired, but I'm really mean. I just like you. I love you and I'm bored. I'm sick. I want to slap myself up, but I still forget that you're not mine. I have no reason to care about you. You are a star in the sky. I can only Look at it from a distance.

　　(II)

　　I really miss you very much and love you very much. Even if we used to have a lot of unhappiness, when I think of all the good things before, I feel so sorry. I really want to stay with you! We have been separated for nearly two months, and both sides have caused harm to each other and can't go back. It's really uncomfortable...

　　(III)

　　Let me tell you a secret. I like you, really. It's funny. I confessed in such an old-fashioned way. I used to think I was just joking and playing. As a result, I really like it. When she brought so many people to block me, I really didn't know whether I was more afraid or lost. In fact, I have known it for a long time, but I still hope you like it little like cerebral palsy. Let me give you a word." I hid the roses behind me and listened to you. The wind was gentle.

　　(IV)

　　I like you. I really like you, but I dare not talk to you. I can only watch you talk and laugh with others. I can only envy you. I wish I would talk to you next time. I love your jia.

　　(V)

　　Qiu Jiahua, I like you. I like you when you don't know me. I know you and I can't do it, so let's be friends. Although I think it's strange to be friends with people you like, there's nothing you can do. You don't like me. Every time you let me recommend a friend to meet me, I feel a little sad. I think you are a centralised air conditioner. You are not my type, but I still like you.

　　(VI)

　　Qiu Jiaye, I love you so much. Why don't you know? I have liked you for two years. I beg you to take the initiative, okay? When you fight with other girls. I admit that I'm jealous, but I'm not jealous. It's so annoying, you idiot.

　　(7)

　　Qiu Yj, today is the 10th. I came back from school. This week, they have been telling me, "It's time to put it down and think about others." "Why? He doesn't like you anymore." I know you don't like me, but what should I do? I can't let it go. It's midnight. I can't sleep. Close your eyes is once. I've been having nightmares recently. If I told you to do nightmares in the past, you will definitely laugh at my little □□. I'm afraid of this thing and then turn on the voice to tell me stories. Now, I sleep with songs at night. I have something I'm very proud of this week. Oh, I won the prize in my art homework. I wanted to send you a message, but I opened the list. It's time to remember that I don't have your contact information anymore. I'm about to have a holiday. You said we met during the winter vacation. Now I don't want to tell you is that I'm going to see you. I saw that you and your brother talked about laughing and chatted with your girlfriend. Qiu yj. We broke up for two months. You have started a new life. This is the last time I leave you a message. If there is a day, you will read the message. I hope you can still remember me at that time. I think I must start to go back to your unknowledgable life. You are my first love. I am well known as the first love. I like. There are too many memories between us. You leave too many memories in my world. Traces, I've always been controlling my miss for you, but I realised that I won't cry for you anymore. I want to live for myself. Qiu yj, I won't think of you on thunderstorms in the future. I won't miss you in nightmares. Anyway, I will forget you. Let's stop today after my favourite.

　　(8)

　　Qiu yj, I miss you so much. I've been cycling your favourite songs again today. I listened to songs and watched your Kugou homepage. I watched that you followed a girl. Maybe she was your new girlfriend, but I was so jealous of her so much. When we were together, I only followed you and you never went back. I found her QQ. I saw the official announcement photos of you holding hands. I saw that your good brothers blessed you. I remembered that when we were together, there was no official announcement, and your brother even we were together for almost two years to know my existence, but my friend knew that you had existed for more than three years. Qiu, do you know that since we were together, I have talked to my friends about you talking to me with my sisters. For more than three years, I have chatted with my sister ten sentences and nine sentences without leaving you, and you? I ask yourself, I never force you to do what you don't like. I don't force you to make official announcements, nor do you to change the portraits of a couple. I have a lot of feelings in my collection. Head, but I'm afraid you think I'm annoyed. I've never told you. How can I tell you that I'm jealous of your official announcement. You take the initiative to take the initiative to introduce her and ask her to change her. I'm really sad. What the pastime in your eyes? Qiu. It's been 784 days since we met. How can I forget you? I really seem to give up. You don't cry for you, but I just can't do it. What should I do? Qiu, I really want to let you go, but what should I do? What should I do if I have no hope for love. What should I do?

　　(9)

　　To be honest, I quite reject anyone from talking to me. I can't see it clean together, and I just don't like anyone to threaten what I'm going to do. I have no choice about this kind of behaviour, but I can't solve the relationship really well. I won't refuse. I don't want to bear the consequences of refusing. For example, the questions you often asked me before, as well as the photos you asked me for, are really helpless. Really, sometimes you want to avoid the questions you ask, but you keep holding on those questions.

　　(10)

　　Qiu yj, if we don't break up, this year will be our fourth year. Today is the 37th day of breaking up. I'm doing well. Today, I went to buy milk tea and saw the post-it note I wrote to you before. I didn't keep it on the wall of the milk tea shop. I tore it off and threw it away. I cut my long hair for you on the shoulders today. It's ugly, but I don't regret it at all. I threw away everything about you. In this way, can I not remember you, Qiu. If you don't like it next time, remember to say it and delete it. Remember not to like it but agree to get back together because you are unwilling. Remember not to smoke and drink all the time. Just remember my voice. I erase those promises for you and wish you peace and peace.

　　(11)

　　I wish you peace and happiness, and I wish you all around you in the future, or remember me.

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