《L and R(念星）》蚕月十一

9、第九章：怀念

　　好久没有回到“星星的思念”，这里即将被重建，包括我生活的居民区和对面那片别墅，我们家得到了一笔拆迁费，爷爷奶奶的遗产加上爸爸攒的和借的一些钱让我们住在了北京的海淀区的电梯房里。这里离北京北站和故宫都不远，交通便利了许多，我实现了在北京的旅游自由。不论是家庭还是自己，我都不再像小时候那样自卑了。我如愿的考进了北京外国语大学，爸爸扬眉吐气地在亲戚朋友面前摆了酒席炫耀了一番。自从结婚了以后，他大半辈子都抬不起头，因为我他终于神气了一次。他不了解我为了高考付出了多大的心血，我有几次差点熬夜到昏厥，月经失调，经常看花眼。北京的学生都拼了命地学习，我只能比他们更卖命，才能不输人。这个社会，没有背景，没有社会地位，你就只能靠自己的一大步和别人的一小步持平了，这就是命。如果再让我经历一次高中，我宁愿选择折寿。
　　我从背包里拿出一个尘封已久的盒子，都是她留给我的，最后那点想念。几年了？整整三年了吧，我没有再打开看过。对她的歉意和离开的一丝埋怨现在也都烟消云散了，只不过看着这个盒子我心里苦苦的，竟有些犹豫要不要打开。“都要彻底离开这里了，这片草地也要消失了，不如今天就彻底结束掉这份念想”我打开盒子，一张过时的圣诞卡片，一封信，一本绘画册和一些小礼物。圣诞卡片我还记得，当时我只看懂了中文，是祝我圣诞快乐的话。英文是什么呢，
　　“Merry Christmas！ my girl.My love for you ，flying from Korea to Australia, across the mountains of America, then across the vast Atlantic Ocean, and around to China.Hope you are always happy”（圣诞快乐，女孩。我对你的爱从韩国飞到澳大利亚，穿过美洲的层层山脉，广阔的大西洋，绕过一圈来到中国。希望你永远开心），她真是个浪漫的小天使。“ , !”（你是我在中国认识的第一个朋友，爱你哦！）。我的脸上洋溢着笑意，这张卡片不自觉的把我拉向了六年级的那个冬天，没什么雪花，但有她，给了我力量去改变，去做自己。
　　还有一张信！我还记得我很恨自己没有早点发现那封信。“, ! . . . . . ”（王思，你好！我是罗念星。我从来没想过短短几天就遇到这么好的朋友，我们就像姐妹一样！你是我重要的存在，即使我回到了澳大利亚，去了韩国也依然会想起你。不要忘了我，我爱你。）
　　“I want to share a story with you: Once upon a time, a little girl followed her family from Korea to Australia, but eventually they immigrated to Australia.She loves music and passed an interview with I.M Entertainment to become an trainee. As long as she can endure hardship, she can start her career as an idol singer, like a K-pop star on TV.The price is that she will be away from her family for at least three years, perhaps longer.When she was a child in South Korea, ostracized by her classmates because she was half-Korean. Some boys laughed at her for being half-Korean, and the girl also isolated her because of her existence.She was afraid to tell her mother because she was afraid she would be sad, but whenever the boy pointed at her and said she was Chinese, she would rebel, \"I am Korean!Please don\'t say that about me!\"After that, I was afraid of China. She thought Chinese people were not so friendly except for her mother.Until Ishecame to China, grandpa, nanny aunt, many, many Chinese people are very nice.Luckily, she met a Chinese angel girl, who had beautiful eyes and a free soul.Although they come from different countries and have different cultural backgrounds, they talk about everything and get along like family.Eager to make friends, she cherished the Chinese girl and gradually fell in love with her. SThey were both born the same year. She knew that such feelings were different from friends.She has good friends in Korea and Australia, but for this Chinese girl, she knows she has a different feeling and she wants to be with a Chinese girl forever.She was precocious, but she didn\'t have a boyfriend at school.The Chinese girl has many ideas that she agrees with. She is very clever and lovely, humorous and polite, and considerate of the Korean girl\'s shortcoming in Chinese.Her beautiful eyes and interesting soul attract the Korean girl and make the Korean girl fall in love with her.When we slept together at night, the Korean girl could not help but turn on the light and quietly looked at the Chinese girl.With long eyelashes and a quiet sleeping face, she could not help kissing the Chinese girl. She knew that the Chinese girl found it and nervously turned off the light and went to sleep.She woke up very early and wrote this letter to the Chinese girl.The next day she would leave for Australia, then say goodbye to everyone and go to Korea alone to pursue her dreams.She couldn\'t bear to see the Chinese girl. She fell in love with her.”
　　（我想给跟你分享一个故事：从前一个小女孩，她跟着家人四处奔波，有时是韩国有时是澳大利亚，不过最终他们移民到了澳大利亚。她很喜欢音乐，并通过了IM娱乐公司的面试，成为了一名练习生，只要她能吃苦，就能成为一名偶像歌手出道，像电视上的韩流明星一样。代价是她要离开家人至少三年，也许更久。她想到小时候在韩国因为是中韩混血的原因，受到了同学的排挤，有男孩嘲笑她是半个韩国人，女孩也因为她的存在而孤立她。她不敢告诉自己的妈妈，因为她怕妈妈会伤心，但是每当男孩指着她说她是中国人时，她会反抗“我是韩国人！请不要这样说我了！”。从那之后她很害怕中国，她以为除了妈妈外，中国人都不那么友善。直到她来到了中国，外公，保姆阿姨，很多很多中国人都很好。幸运的是，她遇到了一个中国的天使女孩，那个女孩有着漂亮的眼睛和自由的灵魂。虽然她们来自不同的国家，有着不同的文化背景，但她们无话不谈，相处的像家人。很渴望结交朋友的她很珍惜这位中国女孩，也慢慢爱上了她，她们两个同年出生，但她知道这种感情是区别于朋友的。她在韩国和澳大利亚都有好朋友，但对于这个中国女孩，她明白她有着不一样的感觉，她想永远和中国女孩在一起。其实她很早熟，但在学校没有谈过男朋友。中国女孩有许多她很认同的想法，她很聪明可爱，既幽默又礼貌，体谅着韩国女孩汉语不好的缺点。她美丽的眼睛和有趣的灵魂吸引着韩国女孩，让韩国女孩爱上了她。晚上一起睡觉的时候，韩国女孩忍不住打开了灯静静地看着中国女孩。长长的睫毛，安静的睡颜让她忍不住吻了中国女孩，她知道中国女孩发觉了，很紧张的关灯睡觉了。她很早就醒来，给中国女孩写了这封信。第二天她就要离开这里回到澳大利亚，然后告别所有的人，一个人到韩国追求梦想。她很舍不得这个中国女孩，她爱上了她。）我顿了顿，像是被开了一枪，子弹射进了我的五脏六腑。
　　“Leila，I heard that you were born at night and a beautiful girl, so I gave you a name：Leila.What\'s more, L and R are like the left and right channels of a tape player; they cannot be separated.Just like Leila and Roxanne.”(听说你出生在夜晚，又是个漂亮的女孩，我送给了你一个名字叫Leila,它的寓意就是如此。更重要的是，L和R就像是磁带播放机的左右声道，他们不能分开。就像我们一样。)
　　上了大学，我主攻英语，大一报了韩语班学习韩语，大二过了韩语TOPIK6级，大三在语言机构兼职韩语老师，大四在韩企实习兼韩语翻译，毕业自费在韩国研修，改了名字叫王晨，向阳而生，丢掉一切黑暗的束缚。现在开挂似的在韩国兼职随行翻译，有英语兼职需求也完全没有问题。