《red light》不渡万山

1、第 1 章

　　love you, i'm not afraid
　　and it's like a fire
　　you're here now that i think of you
　　so what will we do
　　if you're not by my side?
　　It was the first week of summer and everything about them felt right. They had finally been able to start dating and even though they'd known each other for years, it didn't feel real yet – or at least until they made it official. It also didn' t seem as though they were going anywhere in the near future so he decided to bring up the topic one day.
　　"I'm thinking of moving out."
　　He watched her face fall, as expected, but it only lasted a moment before she looked back at him again with a smile on her face. He thought about that night when he told her that he wouldn't be coming back after the move; how she had cried a little then, but had accepted it easily enough. It felt like he had let her down somehow, like he was disappointing her. He was never going to tell her how scared he really was, especially after everything she had gone through and everything they both did.
　　Now, they were laying on her bed, looking at the ceiling while listening to music that was playing softly from his phone. His fingers were intertwined with hers, which he loved every second because it felt as though nothing else existed in the entire world just then.
　　She took a deep breath before speaking again, her eyes still fixed above them.
　　"What are you talking about?"
　　He chuckled lightly before answering. "Moving to Seattle."
　　The silence that followed his statement could have probably been used to make a song, considering how heavy it seemed to hang around in the room. Her eyes darted to look over at him quickly, as if to see if this was all a joke, but when she met his gaze again, there was a serious glint in her eyes. A part of her knew that it wasn't, but she couldn't help the feeling of disappointment that she got regardless. She sighed quietly before sitting up slightly.
　　"Are you okay?" she asked him as she sat cross legged beside him. The light shone through the window illuminating their faces.
　　He nodded slowly and gave her a weak smile before responding. "Yeah. I guess I just wanted you to know first.
　　I've missed living in Seattle and I want to see where we can go. Maybe I'll get a job there. Do something creative," he laughed softly at himself.
　　Her heart ached just a little bit more than it already had at his words and despite how much she wanted nothing more than to comfort him, she had to resist. There was no telling how badly things would go for them without him around anymore. If he ever truly left, they could both lose him forever.
　　"And I think you should come with me. Not just to Seattle. I mean –" he stopped mid sentence when his hand found hers under the covers. He squeezed it once before continuing. "I don't know what you think would happen when I'm working all day, trying to find a place in Seattle and then trying to figure out how I'd pay rent on time. I know I'm not the best at cooking, but I don't think I' d starve. And it's not like I'll be completely away from you – well...I won't, I guess. At least I don't think I will." He paused for another second and then continued. "So I was wondering…would you be okay with that?"
　　For just a moment, she didn't say anything. She kept staring into those brown eyes of his, almost pleading for some sort of answer. But when the truth came crashing down on her she knew she couldn' t lie.
　　She had always known that if the two of them weren't together, he would eventually end up leaving. And when things hadn't worked out for either of them, he would be far too busy doing whatever it was he did to care. So maybe it was better this way anyway, even if she was starting to miss him a lot less than she should.
　　She forced herself to give him a small smile, though the pain in her chest was almost worse. "Of course. What happens when your life becomes too stressful?" she said, forcing out the words.
　　His shoulders relaxed immediately, as if she had passed the test. He leaned forward onto his hands as if he hadn't realized he had been tensing up, letting out a soft laugh. "That was an easy question! Now, I need to know yours."
　　Her cheeks reddened, knowing exactly why he had wanted the information. It was just something that couples did.