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After months of hesitation, I finally decided to use AI to revise my resume. Around the same time, I reached out to several acquaintances-Dr. Prejudice, Dr. Gentle and Manager Sharp.
Dr. P was a former colleague. He had only stayed in our department for a few weeks before leaving. And he is now based in M city.
"Where are you working these days?" I asked him casually.
I didn't expect him to call me later that night.
"Hi, Dr. P." I felt a little sense of unease as I picked it up.
"Gu, what's up?"
"I quit."
"When?"
"Several months ago."
"Why did you leave?"
"The boss planned to pour a lot of resources into medical devices," I replied, "That wasn't an area I wanted to devote myself to, so I left."
"That makes sense. It doesn't go with you." He said quickly before changing the subject, "What's your plan now?"
"Maybe M city, S city, or H city." I said. Not wanting to stay passive, I asked in return, "What about you? What have you been doing recently?"
"Well...you know, I'm in M city now. Just doing some travel-related work." His hesitation told me more than his words. I didn't press further. I already knew the answer—he had left the medical field entirely..
I told him about what I had observed over the last few months. And he responded, "You should see this as an insider, not just as an outsider looking on...."
His tone carried a rather pessimistic view of the medical industry. I wasn't convinced and pushed back., "But this year is considered the first year of China's innovative drug boom. There have been several major deals worth hundreds of millions of dollars in the mainland."
He rejected my view immediately.
“You can't see it that way. Outsiders watch the excitement, but as an insider, you should understand what's really going on.”
"What do you mean?"
"In recent years, the capital market went completely crazy. Now there simply isn't enough money left. You can’t find the job you truly want—and that’s not your fault. Supply far exceeds demand. What kind of work are you hoping to do?"
"R&D," I said. "Something innovative."
"You sound exactly like me when I first came back from overseas." he replied, "I only wanted to do something simple, but everything turned out to be incredibly hard. The pharmaceutical industry here is fundamentally different from that abroad. Foreign drugmakers have accumulated decades of experience and capital, so they can afford to carve out a small portion just for research. Domestically, we poured money into medicine with a level of frenzy and blind optimism that no other country has matched—yet the returns have been limited.."
We talked a bit more before hanging up.
Later, I received a message from Manager Sharp, who works at a cell therapy company. Last year, I interviewed with that company and even received an offer. Ironically, this time I couldn’t even secure an interview. She told me she would forward my CV directly to HR and I thanked her.
The last person I contacted was Dr. Gentle. He has been remarkably fortunate. In the first half of this year, he was still desperately trying to find a position at our institute, and we had helped him apply for a talent program. Unexpectedly, in the second half of the year, an employee from that same institute began reaching out to him for help.
He asked me why I left and about the current situation of the institute. Then he suggested that I send my resume to him or apply directly through the platform. Before he even finished his sentence, I cut in and said, "Sure-if you could pass it on, HR might at least take a closer look."
The next day, nothing happened.
I felt deeply frustrated-until I read a book called Magic. One sentence stayed with me: " Gratitude is wealth; complaint is poverty."
It struck me harder than I expected.