《Dancing Bummer》洗衣

2、Order II Etern

　　I was sitting next to Janis that afternoon in Philosophy. The air conditioner was so loud that I couldn't even hear Prof.D. His tousy look made it hard to tell how old, or young, he was. A leany, tall, pale man in dark brown all the year round, he was never an attractive teacher. His broken, monotone voice and eyebrow-raising practice of reading through the handouts word by word, which were copied from the textbook word by word, all added to the wide-spread wicked assumptions of his health conditions.

　　Actually, everybody knew that he did leave his job for around one year for "a good rest" after some major medical treatment, but, as part of the holy tradition of the town, we tended to believe that his wife was suffering from some unknown dumps. We threw at him, as well as her, our most sincere sympathy. Decent people like them deserved our prayers, exactly as Granny Mary-Lou told us as kids.

　　Speaking of prayers and God and church and staff, I always had some aberrant assumptions, which were safely closeted and preserved since my childhood in miserable darkness. To me, first of the first should be that God, if there was such thing, was rational. Rational and wise as he was in my mind, he would look upon worships and services as some amusing travesties, which only served our selfish need in acquiring a vague sense of security and temporary inner peace. No, God is my friend. And, I believed He knows who I was and what I was made of. God love me, in a way you would never understand. I did hold the naive idea that I was somewhere in His panel.

　　Eternity sucked, Buddy.